I'm Talking to you Dummy.

Random Thoughts In The Wee Hours

I just finished watching the movie "Dummy" with Adrien Brody and Milla Jojovich. It was cute and amusing. I will not put on my filmmaker hat for this one. I will address this as regular person who knows very little about film.
Ventriloquists. What is up with them. Think about this for a second. You take a guy (or a gal, but lets say guy for the sake of argument), you take a guy, sit a block of wood on his lap and he basically talks to himself.

Now, (stay with me here, this is where it gets good) if this same person had, say a watermelon on his lap or perhaps a gravy boat, and started talking to it (and then making it talk back) you could assume with a modicum of accuracy that this person is a whack job and should be in a nice padded room where he can't do any harm to himself or the fine china. Swap out said gravy boat for a a block of wood with a mouth and we pay him to entertain small humans and old people.

Now here is the other interesting thing. I think ventriloquists tend to entertain the elderly and the very young for one simple reason. Neither of them can really run away. They are pretty much stuck there. No hope of escape. And you notice that niether the elderly nor the extremely young ever call up the local ventriloquist union hall (or wherever it is they congregate) and say "Hey, we need Mr. Phips and Sparky over here right away!" No, it's always some 36 year old activities director or a parent in their late twenties. Not to mention the fact that as soon as the Ventriloquist shows up, said Activities Director and Parents make a bee-line for the break room or the back deck (respectively). They don't actually hang around to watch the psychopathic behavior taking place in the common room/TV room. But there's more. While the psychopath talks to himself, inevitably a child will begin to cry hysterically (not because she is scared, but because of the sheer pity she feels for this poor soul talking to a potential hat stand or salad spoon). And then ultimately an elerly person will wet themselves. No reason, the elderly just do that.

So tell me. What is the fascination? I mean, you know the dummy isn't alive. You know it's not talking. So basically you are sitting there watching this guy (usually in a bad suit and bow tie) making jokes and laughing at them. All I can think of is the awful ventriloquist in "Broadway Danny Rose". Barney Dunn. And as Woody says, "When they can't get an animal act they call Barney". At least Barney Dunn was funny, because he stuttered (perhaps that's cruel) but hey, show biz is brutal. Really it's enough already with the ventriloquists.

Now, let's talk about Mimes....